yes. it has happened

hi,
it has been a long time. i had been at home for farking four months. FOUR MONTHS! and i still cannot forgive myself and i cannot forget the incident. a farking metal piece flew so god damn hard and hit my eye. i had never felt so fucking miserable before. i am now partially blind in one eye. everything i see is not as beautiful as before. No one can understand my feeling. i really hope really hope my vision will come back. i really dun know why this thing happen on me? why? what did i do wrong? i cannot blame anyone but my foolishness and carelessness. Damn. i really hate it. ppl might tell me, u still got one eye what. u still look the same. but eyes are the windows to your soul. it will affect every single thing. i really dun know how to pick myself up from here.

i might have shitty job. i can take it. i might have a shitty hard life. i can take it. but my vision. i really regret for what has happened. really. i dunno how to be happy anymore. i love cars, gym, babes, but all these does not seem to interest me anymore. i really want to get over it. but i really can't. what the fuck is wrong exactly. anyway, i love u guys.

love
mom
sher
ap
jack
sys
nd